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Heart is broken...

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Butterfly1
Posts: 115
Joined: Thu Jun 02, 2016 6:13 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Butterfly1 »

Hi ladies,

Princess please do not let your health visitor upset you. As Nicola said you are Arielles mummy and YOU know her best and know that she is thriving. She is gaining weight and meeting milestones so well done you! Hopefully your GP will offer some reassurance.

Nicola I am glad you have your sisters wedding and hen party to focus on and look forward too. How are you feeling? When is your next hospital appointment?

Kate- I hope you are ok?

take care xx

princess pink
Posts: 896
Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2015 12:47 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by princess pink »

Hey ladies, I don't know if they changed how u msg on here but this is 3rd time iv had to re write this nsg coz I didn't get to send ut straight away it makes me login again n then my msg us erases is annoying.

Nicola I understand it's hard to not see ur pregnanct friends if u all socialise so much.

Its really positive that u have ur sister's hen night n wedding to focus on n look forward to. I understand why u don't want ur friend to bring her baby... shel have to come with out her baby or leave him or her with the dad mayb.

I can see why its easier to be happy for ur friends pregnancy after knowing she has too been through heartache.

Its great ur exercising with running n ur hoola hoop sounds fun.. just don't over do things especially as ur still healing.

Yea ur right n I too hope that the doctor says Arielle is fine n healthy when she's examined next Tues. Its just worrying n makes me feel like im not taking care if her well enough. But ur right she does seem healthy n happy n I'm doing best I can.

I hope u got on ok at hospital. How did it go?

I hope u don't mind I read ur post on here that u were telling Kate to read... it was so detailed n emotional to read n I look forward to wen ul be able to hold the happy ending to it ;)

Butterfly thank u for yr kind words ;) I am trying to not worry n I do feed Arielle as much as she will have. Me n her dad sometimes wake her up to offer her milk if we think its been too long coz sometimes at night she can sleep for 6/7 hrs before wanting a feed n in the day she makes up for it n will sometimes have feeds 2/3 hrs instead if the usual 4 hr gap so we feed her as much as we can n obviously if she's hungry she lets us know n she is happy n healthy... I just don't want her to be underweight so you hope the doctor won't be worried. These health visitors can send u mad.

How are u? How's ur pregnancy going? I hope all is well with u.

Kate how are u? I hope ur ok.

I hope all u ladies have a restful wknd. X x x x

Nicola1720
Posts: 424
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 10:11 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Nicola1720 »

Hi Ladies,

The hospital visit went well, they confirmed all my bloods have come back ok and have offered to put me on a trial they are running called SIM (scratch in miscarriage) it means I have to wait for this period (which we were anyway) and then track my ovulation next month and once I've conformed I've ovulated I can go in for the scratch and I'll either receive it or a placebo but I won't know which until the trial closes. They will then let me go off and get pregnant (however long that takes) once I am I call them and they will see me every 2 weeks for a scan from 6-12 weeks and then every 6 weeks after. They said I have a 70% chance to go on and have a normal pregnancy anyway without the scratch, and with it it's higher. If I do miscarry again they will take the tissue and test for chromosome issues so I think it's the best steps to take. If they come back negative they will offer more tests like killer cells etc but I've discussed it with my partner and we've agreed to do it. If I hadn't got pregnant I could have done it this cycle but they said it's best to have a period first to make sure all is ok.

Toni - I am sure you will get on just fine on Tuesday but keep us updated won't you.

Hope everyone has lovely weekends. We had snow yesterday but it's gone today.

Speak soon xx

princess pink
Posts: 896
Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2015 12:47 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by princess pink »

Hey Nicola, sorry iv taken so long to get on here.. iv been busy with Arielle n visitors.

I'm pleased for u that ur hospital appointment went well n that ur bloods came back normal.

Im so glad for u that u are being put on this scratch trial n that wen u get preg again ul get reg scans... im so glad they are offering u all this help. I really am confident ul b healthy preg this yr n il continue to pray for u.

How are u feeling? I hope u are healing n ur feeling more positive n hopeful. Ur time will ded come. Ul soon have ur rainbow baby in ur arms... I just know it. Xxx
We've got my bf sister over from America n his niece n her bf over from Wales staying with us. It's lovely they have got to meet Arielle & are getting to spend time with her. I know it's good for her but as silly as it may sound I'm finding it hard to share her with them coz they are quite full on with her which is nice but a bit hard to deal with especially wen I'm always tired n not that sociable since had Arielle n lost alot of confidence. But I know I need to be happy for Dave having his family here to meet Arielle. I guess its coz its usually just me n Elle. Yesterday we went into town n I left Arielle in buggy with her dad to go loo n wen I came out he'd given his sis the buggy so she was pushing around the shops. I wanted tp say give it back to me but then thought I need to try relax n let her push the pram. May sound silly but its hard to see someone else do it so I ended up walking around the shop with her as wanted to know where Arielle was. My sis thinks I need to relax a bit.. I have been trying n I let Arielle's Auntie n Cousin feed her a bottle. Its just hard to share her with her dad's family especially as don't know them too well.I guess im more clingy then Elle is n not ready to go out n leave her yet for like a night out not like her dad did on Xmas do overnight n hes out tomo night too. My sis thinks I should go out one eve n let her dad have her... I may try to but I don't know if I'm ready to yet n Arielle is 3 months now.

I saw a really nice doctor on Tuesday for her check up. Arielle was just weighed n she's 10 lb & 6 oz now. Doctor said she can see why health visitor was concerned before coz by her weight chart her weight was bit low on the centile chart but that now its pickedup so her wweight is fine n she didn't check anything else.

Iv got to take Arielle to be weighed at clinic on Tuesday n a week later at docs but as long as it carrys on the same as its going now then her weight is fine n Arielle is just a petit baby which me n her dad knew coz we are both naturally small with fast metabolism. Well obvs im bigger now after having Arielle.

I hope everyone is ok. Xx

Nicola1720
Posts: 424
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 10:11 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Nicola1720 »

Hi Toni,

That's ok - I know you must be busy.

I'm going ok thank you, I'm staying positive and have a good feeling for the next time around plus I'll have all the support from the hospital too. I'm also being referred for a full range of hormone testing which I should get done in the next month or so.

I went to reflexology the other evening and she said I felt very healthy and had good energy which made me feel better, I can't go back to acupuncture until my cycle has resumed so she knows where I am each time.

I understand how you must be feeling too with your boyfriends family. I'm sure you are not quite feeling yourself yet and you want to be with Arielle all the time, why wouldn't you. I'm sure it will get easier as time goes by and you might appreciate the break from time to time. I agree with your sister it would be good for you to go out and be you again even if it's just for a few hours, think it will do you the world of good.

Really glad things went ok with the doctors too, I'm sure they are just being over cautious and as long as she's gaining then that's all that matters.

Hope everyone is doing ok. Xx

princess pink
Posts: 896
Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2015 12:47 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by princess pink »

Hey Nicola, sorry its taken me ages to get on here again. ... I been busy n days go so fast. Arielle has started to get more clingy with me... crying wen I leave the room. I hope shel grow out it or maybe its coz she is teething. .. well I think she is.

She was weighed at clinic yesterday n health visitor says her weight has dropped a bit again n want me to weigh her there every 4 wks which I will but they can't be sure of her weight wen scales is different to one at doctors. Im taking her to be weighed at doctors next week. I still think she's doing well. She's been bit off her feeds coziv changed her teets from newborn to 3 months plus ones so I think she just needs to get use to them. So coz she's feeding less I'm feeding her more often.

I'm glad u are feeling positive n that u have a good feeling for bext time u get pregnant. I have a really good feeling for u too.

Im pleased the hospital are keeping an eye on u n going to do tests.

That is great that u have been told ur healthy n good energy.

I definitely think this year is ur year... I hope ur ok.

Yea ur right I think it was just overwhelming having all my bf family here n sharing Arielle with them.
I know it was good for them n for her to spend time together.

Yea u right... it would probably b good for me to have a break from Elle even for few hrs. I guess the first time will b the hardest.

I think I am going to book a hair appointment at hairdresers a week from Saturday as my haur needs trimming n re straightening. It would mean leaving Elle with her dad for about 4 hrs including travelling time to hairdresers n bk so that will b a challenge for me leaving her but I think im going to try.

I hope everyone is ok. Xx

Nicola1720
Posts: 424
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 10:11 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Nicola1720 »

Hi Toni,

That's ok - I know you have your hands full so don't ever apologise, it's lovely to chat to you when you get chance though.

As long as you know Arielle is fine that's what matters and I'm sure when you weigh her again there in 4 weeks they will see that, it's silly going to different places like you say with different scales. We all fluctuate day to day anyway.

It will be good for you to get out and get your hair done and I'm sure it will make you feel nice too.

I'm doing well thank you. I can't believe we are coming towards the end of January - it's flown by. February is also a busy month for me with my sister, dad & mums birthday and my husbands mums birthday also, plus valentines which we always go away for. We are going to the Cotswolds (if you have heard of it) we have a hotel with spa and have booked a champagne afternoon tea for when we arrive on the Friday so I am really looking forward to that and I also have a weekend in centre parcs celebrating a friends 30th birthday which will be nice.

Hope all you girls are ok. Xx

princess pink
Posts: 896
Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2015 12:47 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by princess pink »

Hey Nicola, iv been trying to get on here for days but every time I try iv had to see to Arielle.

She's been poorly since Tuesday coz she had her 16 wks 3 injections... she was so brave getting them done. I felt for her being in pain n crying. . She seemed ok wen we got home but then since then she's been poorly n crying alot n clingy. She had a temperature Tuesday night n hasn't since but still really warm n not herself. It was so stress yesterday coz she would only sleep if was lying on me where she will usually sleep in moses basket. She's perked up today but still clingy n not eating much. So im trying to feed her often as I can. Been giving her calpol n hoping she will be better soon. I feel for her but I know she seems better today than yesterday. She's been refusing bottle today but at least shel breastfeed for a bit. Iv just been feeling stress lately n even before Elle was ill I been feeling depressed. .. don't know what is wrong with me.. just feel drained.

I did leave her for first time sat morning with her dad n got my hair done n it wasn't as hard to do as I thought n I only msg him once to see how she was n I was out for 4&half hrs. So hopefully il be brave to do it again sometime maybe to do something social.

I even took Arielle to my friends about a week ago on train n tram. I was going to try go shops today with her but she's not herself so I think il keep her hom n maybe pop out wen her dads hom so I can leave her with him.

Thanks n ur right re her weight. . She was weighed at doctors on tues n it hasn't dropped but not high as they would like. Doctor was really nice n said she thinks Elle is just a slim baby.. she's 11 lbs now and shel be 4 months old in 6 days. But coz health visitors like babies to follow the growth chart how they want doc said she may still get referred to see a pediatrician n I shouldn't worry coz all will do is they will keep an eye on her weight n mayb take some blood in the future but I shouldn't worry coz Elle seems healthy n fine. So she's going to call me in about a week to let me know.

It was mine n my bf Dave 3 yr anniversary yesterday. We didn't do anything thou just watched eastenders n had dinner n looked after Elle.. he got me a lovely card n I said my present will come in the post coz hes ordered it online.

I got him a card n a junper n smart shirt from topman.. I didn't know what else to get n find it hard to choose presents.


How are u Nicola?

Wow u have a lot of birthdays in Feb.

That is lovely that u and ur hubby are going away for valentines day. Iv heard of cotswolds... ur holiday sounds like it will b lovely n relaxing for u both n just what u need. I bet u can't wait. .

A weekend away for ur friends birthday sounds like it will be alot of fun for u.

Im pleased for u that ur planning all these positive things.
I hope ur doing ok.

I hope all u ladies on here are doing well too. X x x

Nicola1720
Posts: 424
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 10:11 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Nicola1720 »

Hi Toni,

That's ok - it sounds like you have had a stressful for days.

I hope you are ok too, it's all a big change and must be very overwhelming worrying about Arielle with the healthy visitors etc but make sure you are looking after yourself too and see the doctor it you aren't feeling yourself.

Well Done for getting out the other week - I'm sure it did you the world of good and I bet it was nice to get your hair done too ☺

I'm doing ok thanks. Had my first cycle since the miscarriage which is good. I have hospital appointment in two weeks for the SIM trial and then some more bloods so just got to wait to get all that done. We've been so busy being away etc that I've not had much chance to think about it all which is really good.

Happy anniversary too - we will be celebrating our 1 year wedding anniversary in a few weeks. I can't believe how much has happened in the last year.

Hope everyone is well. Haven't heard from Keeponhoping for a while?!

Buttrrfly1 - how are you? X

Butterfly1
Posts: 115
Joined: Thu Jun 02, 2016 6:13 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Butterfly1 »

Hi ladies,

PrincessPink - I hope Arielle has recovered from her injections now and is more settled. Please please seek support/advice if you are still feeling low or depressed. Please do not 'suffer in silence'. Your GP (who sounds great) or your HV can offer support. Are you managing to get enough sleep? I don't think there is anything worse than sleep deprivation. Having some time to yourself to feel like you again will help. Look after yourself ;)

Nicola- I hope you are ok? I think the trial is going to be a really positive process for you. You are a total inspiration Nicola for all that you have been through. Good luck for your tests in a couple of weeks.
Congratulations on your first wedding anniversary coming up soon. I hope you had a lovely break.

I am well thank you. I'm 32 weeks tomorrow and counting down to leaving work in 4 weeks time! Time is starting to fly by which is both exciting and scary!!

I hope Keep On hoping is ok.

Take care
xxx

Nicola1720
Posts: 424
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 10:11 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Nicola1720 »

Hi Butterfly1,

Nice to hear from you. Wow - it really does seem to have flown by doesn't it?! Are you having much time off from work?!

I should be having the scratch trial next week so I'll let you all know how that goes. I'm staying positive though and I know it will be my turn again soon. ☺

Xxx

Butterfly1
Posts: 115
Joined: Thu Jun 02, 2016 6:13 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Butterfly1 »

Good luck for next week Nicola. Please do let us know how it goes. I hope it all goes well. It absolutely will be you soon Nicola and I cant wait for the day that we read some exciting news from you...... ;)

I can't believe next month it will be a year since our journey's started.

Take care xxx

princess pink
Posts: 896
Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2015 12:47 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by princess pink »

Hi ladies ;)

Nicola ur right it can be overwhelming & Arielle's weight is ok but she still little but I still think she's doing ok n is just a petit baby. Her appetite is back since injections n she's developing well. .. she's 4 months now n lifts her head up well n can push her self up wen put on her belly & rolls over to her side & we've just started putting her in a baby walker which shell happily stand up in for a while press the musical keys on it.. so I think it shows she's developing wel...but I still worry about her being small... but all I can do is keep feeding her reg n taking her to the clinic to be weighed is what I'm doing.

I guess the fact she got ill from her injections made looking after her harder than usural.

Thank u ;) Yea I'm glad I was able to leave Elle with her dad to get my hair done. It did make me feel better to get it done.

I am looking after myself thanks
.. its just hard to get to do stuff wen im busy so much with Elle n there's always things needing doing. . As she's getting bigger she's starting to get in a bit more of a routine n sleep longer through the night. .. but its still hard to get much sleep but I know that is normal. So I try sleep wen I can.

It's good u have now had yr first period so ur body is recovering.
That is great u have ur Sim trial coming up.... I hope it goes well. Let us know how it goes.

Its great uv kept busy... how was ur holiday away with ur hubby? I hope it was fun n relaxing for you both.

Thank u ;) My bf ordered my anniversary present online n I got it a week late a couple days ago n it was a lovely present. He got me a gold chain with mine & his & Arielle's names all engraved on it.

That's lovely u have ur 1 yr wedding anniversary soon... I hope u both do something special for it.

Butterfly yes thanks Arielle has recovered from her injections now n is her norm happy self again.

I think il be ok thanks. .. my doc is really nice but she's going on maternity leave any day now but its okay I don't think I need to talk to anyone. I think it just gets a bit hard at times n ur right I don't get enough sleep but im trying to nap more wen Arielle does sometimes. .. it can be hard to nap in day coz we have workmen right opposite our flat banging about on a massive hse they are doing up... They are there every week day n they have been there since July is crazy... I can't wait till they are finished. Sometimes I can sleep through their noise but then I get a headache. .. so I'm always relieved wen its weekend n I get more peace.

I think I find it hard being lonely n as much as I love being a mum It can be isolating. .. iv had my friend & niece & twin sis all visit me this week on different days with their kids so its been nice to have company n to get out the hse to the park out to eat with them n Arielle. Its helped me to feel a bit more like me.

I do want to start taking Elle tp to toddler group but wen she's bit older.

Wow ur now 32 weeks preg Butterfly is great. .. how are u feeling? I hope ur looking after urself... not long now. Make sure u are taking it easy. .. I took my maternity leave at 32 weeks preg. I found it too hard to work longer n had to travel far to work each day n had spd so I took it at right time for me. I know everyone takes it at different times when is right for them.

Nichola it is definitely ur time this year.. I really believe it n I will continue to pray for you n send u positive vibes.

I got my first period since before I was preg so had been 13 months since id had one... was a shock n so heavy n painful but after a day it was light n only lasted 4 days is short for me... I guess my body needs to go back to normal n even thou I bottle feed I still also breastfeed Elle which apparently can make ur periods take a while to come back or they can stop the whole time u breastfeeding is what my doctor told me.

I should try sleep soon coz Elle is fast asleep. Takes me a while to unwind n go to sleep after I get her to sleep.

I hope Kate is doing ok.

Love to u all.

Toni x x x

Nicola1720
Posts: 424
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 10:11 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Nicola1720 »

Hi Toni,

I am doing well thank you. I am booked in for my hospital appointment for the scratch trial this Friday (24th) I will of course let you know how the goes. I feel it's the start of hopefully a successful pregnancy next time around so I'm feeling positive.

We had a lovely weekend away and have been celebrating this weekend for my Mum, Dad & sisters birthdays - I'm actually looking forward to next weekend so we can have a rest

Your anniversary present from your boyfriend sounds lovely and very thoughtful.

Also I can highly recommend silicone earplugs if you're wanting to drown out the noise from the workman. They are so good and block out lots of noise - I use them when my husband has been out drinking as he always snores like abeast then

I suppose it will probably take a few months for your cycles to return back to normal and I know of people who haven't had any periods whilst they have been breastfeeding.

Hope everyone else is ok and have had nice weekends.

Speak soon xx

Butterfly1
Posts: 115
Joined: Thu Jun 02, 2016 6:13 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Butterfly1 »

Good luck for tomorrow Nicola. xx

princess pink
Posts: 896
Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2015 12:47 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by princess pink »

Hi Nicola, I hope tomo goes well. I will be thinking of u. I'm really glad that u feel positive for ur next pregnancy. I feel really positive for u n will keep crossing my fingers for u n praying for you.

I am glad to hear u enjoyed ur weekend away. .. sounded like it was what u needed. U sure have a lot of birthdays in ur family this month.

I know what u mean when u have busy weekends u are greatful to have a resting one.

Yeah it was a lovely anniversary pres from my bf... it was nice that he was so thoughtful...

Thanks for tip... il try the ear plugs...

Yea ur orob right re my periods taking time to go back to normal.

I had quite a few visitors last week with my sis n niece n friend.. was nice to have company.... so this wk I haven't minded as much staying in.

I hope everyone is ok. X x x

Nicola1720
Posts: 424
Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 10:11 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Nicola1720 »

Hi,

Yesterday went well - it was very similar to a smear. I feel like I didn't get the scratch as it didn't hurt and I have had no after effects but I need to think positively. I have more bloods tests a week on Monday and then we can try again - so hopefully next time will be the time. I keep thinking it will happen in March and I'll be due in December when my sister is married and miss the wedding!

Hope everyone is getting on ok? Can't wait to hopefully be sharing exciting news with you soon.

Butterfly1 - when is your due date? I know it's early April.

Toni - I hope Arielle is doing ok. Shame we can't share pictures on here - I would love to see her xx

princess pink
Posts: 896
Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2015 12:47 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by princess pink »

Hey Nicola, I'm pleased to hear ur scratch test went well n wasn't painful. Hopefully it has worked thou.. did they say if u don't have sude effects from it ir feel it much then it means it hasn't worked? Hopefully it has still worked.

Its great u feel so positive n hopefully ur right n u will be preg in march.. but don't worry about ur sis wedding. .. u could well be preg then but doesn't mean ul miss it.

I can't wait to hear good news from u very soon.

I had a dream other night that someone died n they say wen u dream of death that usually it means the opp that someone u know will be preg... mayb that could be a good sign for u...
Ur to will def come very soon I think.

Arielle is doing well thank u. She's 4 months or 19 wks old now. She's grown alot n so alert n has started to roll sometimes from her back to her side n can push herself up a bit on her front n sometimes roll over from her front to her back. She's so loud n funny how she has started throwing her toys. She loves grabbing her feet n smiles alot n has laughed a few times now is cute. She's eating alot so I think she's going through growth spurt. She loves sucking her fingers n thumb n has never took to a dummy. So she is doing well.

I got traim n tram to visit my twin sis other day. Was good to see her n kids n my 18 yr nephew was over from uni.

A couple of my friends came up to see me on Sat n I had lunch in the pub near mine with them & Arielle.

It was nice to get out... I just find it hard to get out with Arielle.

Yeah it is a shame we can't share pics on here. If u are on Facebook I could always send u a pic on Facebook msg of Arielle. My facebook is Toni Adoo.

I hope everyone else is ok on here..xx

Butterfly1
Posts: 115
Joined: Thu Jun 02, 2016 6:13 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by Butterfly1 »

Hi,

I'm glad it wasn't painful and hope that it still worked despite the lack of side effects. I'm keeping everything crossed for you Nicola. I'm positive we will be reading some very exciting news from you soon :)

I cant believe Arielle is 19 weeks already- the time has flown by hasn't it! I bet she is changing day by day. Watching her smile must be just lovely.

My due date is 13/4/17 and if i'm honest I am both excited and terrified !!!

Take care everyone xx

princess pink
Posts: 896
Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2015 12:47 pm

Re: Heart is broken...

Post by princess pink »

Hi Butterfly,

Yeah Arielle has grown so fast. I remember saying she was 1 wk old n now she's 19&half weeks old. Yea it's lovely to see her smile n sometimes hear her laugh now too.

Oh wow so u haven't got that long til ur baby is due. I was the same in the lead up to the birth... its def exciting. I hope ur getting rest. Are I all organised with baby stuff n hospital bag? I hope ur taking it easy. X x

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