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Nobody listened. I lost my left tube.

This is a welcoming place for you to ask your questions and share your knowledge and experiences of ectopic pregnancy.
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Hattylaird
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Apr 30, 2020 9:36 pm

Nobody listened. I lost my left tube.

Post by Hattylaird »

Hi I'm new. This community has been a great help.
I hope this is the right place to post this.

I am feeling very low. I've just finished surgery two days ago. My body hurts, I am low mentally.
I have a toddler who is just two and she doesn't understand at all. I lost a pregnancy before this as well, so it adds on to 'maybe I should just stop. Maybe this is my sign to stop.' I lost my December baby, so now I'll definitely not have another before she's three. Thats a bigger gap than I wanted, but hey, I'm alive. :(

So yeah, I had bleeding a week after my pregnancy test in March and my hcg kept rising though slow and weird on my pregnancy tests, so I asked for scans, and absolutely nowhere would give me scans at all, all the private places near me are closed, and I even went to A&E with body pains and nope, nothing. They took HCG and nothing else.

I had been googling and I had so many people tell me this is how their ectopic started. I just wanted to verify. That was me at 4 weeks.
I asked my GP and she said she didn't see a reason to schedule a scan despite the bleeding and pain, they said they were 'limiting the amount of people who go into the hospital right now', well.

I got to 8 weeks.

Luckily I did not burst, I asked for another HCG test and they even admitted at that point it was rising oddly, (it was over 5000!) but I am so sad! I am sad this happened. I lost my baby, I lost my body part, I feel like nobody listened until it was too late.

I'm sure a lot of you feel similar in some ways.

I feel so broken. They said if I try to get pregnant again, they will follow me immediately from the moment I get pregnant to make sure the baby is in the right place. But that will be pregnancy #4 and one child here, which hurts so much.

I'm not sure I'm ready to ever do this again, especially with the higher chance of ectopics. I'm still recovering and having to do needle injections daily is so painful emotionally and physically. I don't know what to do anymore. Your board has been great help. Thank you. :(

EPT Host 22
Posts: 359
Joined: Fri Nov 20, 2015 10:26 am

Re: Nobody listened. I lost my left tube.

Post by EPT Host 22 »

Hi Hattylaird,

I am so sorry to hear that you have suffered an ectopic pregnancy and loss. I'm glad you have found your way to these boards, as they are filled with women and men who understand the experience. You've been through so much in a short amount of time.

Right now, it's most important to look after yourself. You've been through both physical and emotional trauma, and it's important to take time to heal from these. We grieve for the futures we had expected, while at the same time being grateful to be alive.

Each woman is unique in her recovery, and there is no set time period or process. Please be patient with yourself and give yourself the time to heal. Take all the time you need. There is no set time for which to move through these emotions, and every woman and couple go through at their own pace.

As well, If you think it may help, we can certainly arrange to speak to you about what you have been through and be a shoulder to lean on. My colleagues and I have also experienced ectopic pregnancies and understand how heartbreaking it is. You can ask any questions or simply tell us about the horrible time you have been through. You can also look at counseling services and emotional recovery support on our website under Patients/Emotional recovery. In terms of your care circumstances, you may be aware that you can raise your thoughts via the Patient Advice and Liaison Service or PALS. You can find your local PALS here and it may be an avenue which can help:
http://www.nhs.uk/Service-Search/Patien ... Search/363

Know that we are here for you throughout your recovery, whether you have questions or want to vent. We are here for as long as you need.

With good wishes,


Michele

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811
Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards

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Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk
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Kayjayleo
Posts: 39
Joined: Wed Jul 31, 2019 11:32 am

Re: Nobody listened. I lost my left tube.

Post by Kayjayleo »

I understand how you feel, I’ve been there twice with ectopics and no one seemed to understand how hard it was to adjust. It’s almost too cruel. Only thing I can say is that time heals you, it’s been 9mnths since my last ectopic and I still can’t talk about it without crying x sending you love

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