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I was unsure how much to share in my post as I have been going through what feels like a long and painful journey which started before my ectopic pregnancy. So I have decided to start at the beginning.
My husband and I have been TTC for 18months, we were referred for fertility treatment in December 2019 and due to the pressure the NHS was under prior to covid-19 we had 4 appointments cancelled and then out support and assessments cancelled completely due to government guidance due to covid-19. We went privately for all the tests and found out there was no reason for our lack of success both of us were fit healthy and fertile.
I had an appointment back with the NHS and they prescribed me medication. I took a test the day before starting it and found out I was pregnant. We were so happy and relieved that I didn't require any medical support. We cautiously went through the next 2 weeks and then I started spotting. It stopped after half a day and the rest of the week I was fine. Then on Thursday I started spotting more heavily but had no pain and shrugged it off. I called my GP and they booked me in to the EPU as a precaution.
During our scan we were told they couldn't find a pregnancy but could see something in my left tube. I was then told about the ectopic pregnancy. I was fortunate I was told I could go home as I had no pain and relatively mild symptoms. The hospital called me that evening with my blood results of 211 and advised I needed to return the next few days daily to be reviewed and bloods taken. I have experienced mild pain and cramping but mostly exhaustion and aches all over my left side.
My latest blood result was 77 and I need to continue going into hospital for tests and checks.
I haven't even started to process what has happened over the last week and I still feel in a state of shock. My husband and family have been amazing as have my employer.
I'm afraid for my future fertility especially as it took 18months to reach where we are today. The thought of going through fertility treatment is painful and the thought of not is even worse. I am looking for hope and reassurance during such a scary time.
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,
When we experience ectopic pregnancy we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it's treatment, reduction in fertility, concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal.
You will need space and time to come to terms with everything, there is no timeframe for recovery, take each day as it comes.
It is normal to feel anxious about the future. We generally feel a mix of emotions from wanting to try again to being petrified of what may lie ahead. We never forget, but we learn to accept what happened. It is a slow process that might be weeks or months ahead.
In time, we can get to a place where we feel comfortable trying again. When this is, is individual for each person. Importantly early scans avail. As soon as you know you are pregnant, contact your local EPU to inform them and book in for an early scan at around six weeks. Remind them of your previous ectopic pregnancy. This self refer route is the best route in our view. Hopefully you will have some comfort to know you are under the radar of medical professionals right away.
In terms of chances of future successful pregnancies, studies do not show a significant difference between treatment routes, whether surgical, medical using methotrexate or expectant management (allowing time for the body to resolve the pregnancy itself).
The chances of a further ectopic after a first in UK is 10%. So that's 90% chance of the embryo being in right place next time.
While generally it is possible to conceive after an ectopic pregnancy, the amount of time it takes varies from couple to couple. Factors include age, general health, reproductive health and how often you have sex, among other things. It may be comforting to know that 65% of women are successfully pregnant within 18 months of experiencing an ectopic pregnancy and some studies suggest this rises to around 85% after two years.
Making the decision to begin trying to conceive is an emotional rollercoaster compounded by our sad loss. Again, you are not alone. We here emotional support whenever you need us. There is a specific Preparing for your Next Pregnancy board you can look at too whenever feel ready.
Above all be kind to yourself and allow time to grieve, to heal both physically and emotionally,
Sending much love,
The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811
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I read your post and didn't want to ignore it. I myself had a ectopic pregnancy with expectant management at the end of June. To even find out I was pregnant after 18months if trying and PCOS I was in utter shock. I have actually had 2 periods since but I also have a dull ache on my left hand side, along with a bloated stomach. The doctors told me I must have PTDS and that when people have trauma, it can cause imaginary pain!!! I am under the fertility clinic and awaiting a HSG, which should have been next week and now cancelled! I also feel like its never going to happen for us. Please feel free to message me whenever you like. Hope you are on the mend x
Thanks for your reply. The fertility journey is soon frustrating have you spoken to anybody about rebooking? I have an appointment with my consultant next week to talk through our options so hopefully I will know more.
I think I said before we had numerous appointments cancelled from december-september and I found out I was pregnant 2 days after my first NHS appointment. We did all our tests privately in the end due to the delays.
Hoping you hear something soon.