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First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

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Jo2020
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Sep 27, 2020 7:52 pm

First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by Jo2020 »

Hi,

I was diagnosed with ectopic the 24th of September and removed one of my tubes.
I started bleeding quite heavily very soon after which lasted for about a week and then stopped. Two weeks after I took a pregnancy test that was negative.
Three weeks after I started having brownish spotting up until about two days ago I bleed normally for one day but now it’s more of blood red intermittent bleeding.

Has anyone experienced this? Is this my period or am I just spotting?
How long can the first period be?

vic1983
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 4:01 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by vic1983 »

Hi ya,

I know periods can be a bit all over the place after a tube removal and it can take 3 months for your insides to recover from an ectopic pregnancy so try not to worry too much and just make sure you are aware of any heat coming from the area or bad smell. Bad smell and heat can indicate infection... so keep an eye on that.
I bled for about 1 week after surgery and then my period came 4 weeks or so later... but it was exceptionally light and painless. This put me into panic mode as I was then convinced my tube removal had kick started the end of my ability to have babies! The period after that was extremely painful (to the point where I couldn't go to work, it make me feel sick) and very heavy.... the period after that was about 10 days late which scared the living daylights out of me as I wasn't pregnant.
Give yourself 3 - 4 months of recovery... ignore everything until after then unless it is blatantly an infection, and I am sure all will return to normal. Good luck - we are in this together :-) xx

vic1983
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 4:01 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by vic1983 »

Ps the period 4 weeks after my tube removal I would describe as so light it was spotting, I could have used 1 towel for the whole period and it was totally painless... so very similar to what you are describing! Be aware of the next one coming because I would describe that one as an absolute killer!

Jo2020
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Sep 27, 2020 7:52 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by Jo2020 »

Thank you Vic,

I started worrying whether this was the old lining still bleeding out or a new one, but it seems to be a new one :)

I’m more or less healed on the outside, I had to go and see the doctor last week to remove the stitches as they hadn’t absorbed as they should. But yeah it’s still a risk of infection :)

And thank you again, it’s so lonely now on the other side. This is basically the only page I’ve found that speaks about it. I’m originally from Sweden so I’ve been searching there too but it’s all “this is super uncommon and nothing to worry about. It’s usually a reason” which is so strange as I had no reasons for having this. Everything looked fine. I had a very extensive check up last year before being diagnosed with pcos.
Its generally been a [censored word] year for my fertility.

I hope you’re feeling better now :)

vic1983
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 4:01 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by vic1983 »

Yes it is very lonely. I do not know anyone personally who has been through an ectopic and this site is the only site that seems to offer detailed information and ideas about it all.
I am so sorry for your loss. And I am sorry about your PCOS. It is awful especially when you feel, 'why me?'

I have decided to have IVF. I have an initial consultation in early November. With me being 37, I just don't think I can wait for an NHS fertility check up referral followed by goodness knows how long of 'assisted fertility' from them. I will be 39 before they consider giving it me and they stop offering it at 40. They have told me that they will not give me IVF on the NHS. So I am going to just go private. Mixture of emotions - incredibly sad that it has come to this but a ray of hope that the IVF might work.

xxx

Jo2020
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Sep 27, 2020 7:52 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by Jo2020 »

Yeah I don’t know anybody personally either, most people think about miscarriages which is emotionally quite similar I imagine but the tube is still there. I’m also ridiculously sad about how my bellybutton looks different now. Such a stupid thing but it gets me down.

I really understand you want to try ivf, I started thinking about that almost right away, but I just turned 30 and I thought I could give it a year or two more before looking further. How come nhs won’t be able to help?

vic1983
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 4:01 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by vic1983 »

The NHS would only give me IVF if I had lost both my tubes and there was a 0 per cent chance of me conceiving naturally. They have referred me to a clinic for some 'assisted fertility' but I do not know what that means and I also do not know how long the waiting list is. I don't want to faff about trying to conceive naturally for the next 2 years... or be on an assisted fertility waiting list for the next 6 months.

You are so lucky being 30. If I was 30 I would definitely be happy to try for the next 2 or 3 years naturally. It may seem like a long time but time passes quickly and before you know it you will have conceived again... so give it a go for the next couple of years. You have an 85 per cent chance of conceiving in the next 2 years!

My husband and I were trying for quite a while (almost a year) and then I started using [Brand Name not allowed] Ovulation tests - just the ones that pinpoint your 2 most fertile days and we got pregnant the 2nd and 3rd month of using them. The first pregnancy was chemical and I lost it and the 2nd was the ectopic. They are amazing at pinpointing the exact day you should have sex with a clear smiley face! So use those to up your chances of conceiving as you know exactly when you are meant to be trying.

I am using them this month just in case we fall pregnant before I go for IVF! You never know! It might happen!

Try not to be sad about the surgery scarring or changes to your body because of it... sounds daft but try to view it as a war wound... I doubt that will help you in any way, it must be hard. Mine did not change due to the surgery... but I can see how some would.

xx

Jo2020
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Sep 27, 2020 7:52 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by Jo2020 »

Oh I see, that feels a bit unfair considering how your fertility has acted in the past. I hope it works out for you though. I do know someone who had pcos, was going for fertility investigation, and then in the end they couldn’t afford ivf at that point and decided to wait a couple of years, and suddenly she was pregnant with twins. So it can definitely happen :)

Yeah we’ve been trying since September last year (after our wedding :) ) and my ectopic in September is the first time I got a plus. I have been using ovulation tests and am eating metformin to help regulate my ovulation. So hopefully I’ll be able to conceive soon enough. It’s just hard now that everybody is having children, and second children and I feel like I’ve been pushed out of my friends group because of it.

Thank you for saying that. It’s such a stupid thing to have a hang up on really, but I think it’s still so raw I don’t want to think about the pregnancy or the loss of a tube and focus on my bellybutton :p but I do love the battle scar idea, I read a few years back that if a Viking died in childbirth it was considered a battle and they’d go to Valhalla ;)

And thank you Vic, it’s so lovely to chat with you. It’s helping me calm down a lot ❤️

vic1983
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 4:01 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by vic1983 »

Yes we got married on August 22nd last year and started trying straight away too. Got my first positive in May this year but it was a chemical and I got my period at the normal time it was due to come. Then I bled again a week later which I considered the 2nd half of the chemical coming away. When we got a positive the next month we were over the moon as well as shocked and I was 100 per cent certain it would all be fine. And when they suspected an ectopic I just thought they had got it wrong and assumed it may be another early miscarriage. I was gobsmacked when they told me it was ectopic. I only knew because I got a crippling pain in my right shoulder that intensified over a few hours - to the point where I ended up in tears over it. They kept me in over night, scanned me the next morning and my pelvis was full of blood and my tube had ruptured. Weird thing about it was I got no pelvic pain at all and over night my shoulder pain stopped.... if I had waited until the next day I would not have gone into hospital and they think I would have died at home from internal bleeding... so it was a close shave! And we still want to get pregnant! ha ha! Must be mad!

With the metformin and using ovulation tests I am sure you will conceive again. I am sure you will. And 30 is no age to panic. I wouldnt wait until you were 37 or 38 for IVF but giving it until you are 33 would be no problem and I think once you have been trying 2 years with no luck you get IVF on the NHS anyway. So that should be ok. Honestly I would kill to have only 1 tube and only be 30! I am sure you will be ok.. do not panic! It will definitely happen for you - 85 per cent chance in the next 2 years! The odds are in your favour! :-)

All my mates have got 2 or 3 kids too. And I feel very isolated. Sometimes I won't go out if 2 or 3 of them are together because I dont think I can stand talking about their kids non stop all night. It is almost like any other topic of conversation is banned because they have kids. I cannot bare it. It is like I dont count anymore... and once one of them said, 'oh when you have kids you will understand....' when we were discussing something and I wanted to rip her head off. It was like because I didnt have kids yet my opinion was not valid and did not count. I was raging. So feeling pushed out with friends I can relate to completely. I am so glad I joined this forum. I dont feel quite so desperately lonely anymore.

I am a Christian and despite all that has happened I believe God is good and wants to bless us. I do not think he has any influence on the awful things that happen, so I will pray for you later on and I will pray that you conceive a healthy baby asap. I am praying a catch before IVF!

xx

Jo2020
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Sep 27, 2020 7:52 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by Jo2020 »

Belated congratulations! We got married the 19th of August :)
Oh wow! I’m so happy that you didn’t wait and got in on time. That realisation must be so scary!
I was in quite a lot of pain and started spotting, but mine never raptured . :) Haha I know what you mean, but I think all of this is making us stronger is some ways :)


I know exactly what you mean, I’ve had that whole “when you have children...” It always bugs me as I’ve worked in preschools and been an auntie since 13 so I feel like though I don’t understand the tiredness and pressure I still have a lot of valuable inputs. And yes, it becomes like a special little group you’re not part of.

I really agree, this little chat we have really makes me feel less lonely. I did write a message just after I had my surgery and got a reply almost right away which felt wonderful. This website and forum is really such a great place because people are genuinely really nice and supporting.

Thank you for all your kind words and prayers ❤️

TubelessWonder
Posts: 12
Joined: Sat Sep 26, 2020 2:28 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by TubelessWonder »

Hi guys 👋 I also had tube removed 24th Sept (right one). Mine ruptured before I got to hospital, I thought I'd had a miscarriage so it was a bit of a nasty shock to find out that no it was in fact even worse!

According to the drop in my bbt I should be getting my first period today. I'm dreading it being uncomfortable and heavy, fingers crossed for a light one.

I'm 32 and have no children. My plan is to try until I'm 33 and then go for IVF privately if I have to. Did they say much about your other tube? They just said mine was a bit swollen but that is apparently common after rupture. I dont have any of the risk factors. I am thinking about having a hycosy to check the remaining tube. I'm so impatient and everything takes so much time I dont want to waste it! I didn't get to speak to my surgeon about it afterwards as was in over night and the feedback from the other doctors was pretty limited.

Jo2020
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Sep 27, 2020 7:52 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by Jo2020 »

Hi :)

Same here, I also removed the right one :) I thought the same thing as I had gone to the ER the day before but they sent me home saying they didn’t think it was an ectopic. Fortunately mine never raptured.

Yeah yesterday my period really started and it was very heavy with a lot of pain. But it’s not uncommon for me, my pcos has always made my periods act up a bit. But it’s nice to know the body is working :)

I know how you feel it all feels so slow :/

The surgeon told me they had checked my other tube before removing the affected one just to make sure it was healthy and they told me both tubes looked great, no scarring or anything like that. So they said they had no idea of knowing why this happened.
Did you have laparoscopic surgery?

TubelessWonder
Posts: 12
Joined: Sat Sep 26, 2020 2:28 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by TubelessWonder »

I did yes, and they did check the other tube, just didn't bother telling me about it. I've requested to see my surgery notes but I haven't had them yet.

It still feels so surreal, like it didn't really happen to me! My scars are healing up nicely but I should have been starting to get a bit of a bump by now 😭 I think I'm going to really struggle if I'm not pregnant by my due date (beginning of May).. which doesn't seem very likely to be honest!

vic1983
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 4:01 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by vic1983 »

Hi ya,

I feel the same as you - very impatient and like I don't have time to mess about. It is just awful.

They did check my tube while they were in there as well and told me it looked very good and very healthy, which is good.

Yes I had a laprascopy and they also told me they had no idea why I had an ectopic, but I do know it is more common in women over 35... so maybe that was why? Not sure.

I have my first IVF appointment a week on Monday... role on... I want it done asap! :-)

xx

Jo2020
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Sep 27, 2020 7:52 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by Jo2020 »

Tubelesswonder: I think if they didn’t say much it was probably nothing to mention and that it all looks good :) have you had a call back from them yet?
If not I think you might benefit from giving them a call :)
I know the feeling, it’s really strange. I think about it sometimes as well, that we could have told the family for Christmas and things like that. May is quite a long time and I don’t think it’s impossible :) how long had you been trying for?

Vic: I’m so happy that you got an appointment! :)

TubelessWonder
Posts: 12
Joined: Sat Sep 26, 2020 2:28 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by TubelessWonder »

Wow thats great Vic, monday will be here before you know it! I think you've made a sensible choice in going for the IVF. There's a great podcast about IVF experiences called big fat negative if you like that kind of thing!

Jo - we had been trying for 5 months which felt like FOREVER but I know is pretty quick really. What about you?

vic1983
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 4:01 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by vic1983 »

Thanks for that I might have a look.

It is so lovely talking to people on here xx

Jo2020
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Sep 27, 2020 7:52 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by Jo2020 »

Oh yes five months is nothing in the baby making game really :) I’m sure you’ll soon be having a healthy pregnancy and baby. But I do understand you want to look at more options, I feel the same.
We’ve been trying for almost exactly a year, I was diagnosed with pcos in March this year as well. But my gyno did say how horrible the experience is it’s actually a good sign that I’m ovulating which we were worried about. I was a month away from trying ovulation stimulating medication but with this we are sure ovulating isn’t a problem :)

But I really understand the stress and with this as baggage of course we worry even more. Fortunately there’s so much help to get out there and as we all have been pregnant and even if it didn’t end well this time I think in the future with ivf or naturally we’ll all have our babies :)

Yes I really do love having people to talk to, it makes it so much easier. I have a lot of ups and downs, emotionally. And thinking about going back to being sad every time my period arrives is nothing in looking forward to :/

vic1983
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2020 4:01 pm

Re: First period (?) and spotting after ectopic

Post by vic1983 »

But I really understand the stress and with this as baggage of course we worry even more. Fortunately there’s so much help to get out there and as we all have been pregnant and even if it didn’t end well this time I think in the future with ivf or naturally we’ll all have our babies :)

I love that quote above, it is very comforting and you are absolutely right! We are so blessed that the medical advances we now have are all in our favour... and I think in reality about 96 per cent of people end up having kids! So that is a huge positive!

xx

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