I used to have very long, irregular menstrual cycles, so when I started spotting only five days after my period had stopped, I was very confused. My doctor suggested that I take a pregnancy test, which to my surprise came out to be positive, and registered at 2-3 weeks pregnant. So, I had a period while pregnant, which was even more confusing.
I started googling and, on a forum, someone said my story sounded like hers, and she ended up with a ruptured ectopic pregnancy, so I quickly got in contact with my local hospital.
There they took a pregnancy test, which was again positive. Then I was examined, the nurse pressed on my stomach and said “no way you are having an ectopic pregnancy, it’s not hurting you enough. You’re just fine”, so I walked out of the room full of hope. I was told to go for blood tests to check my hCG (Human chorionic gonadotrophin is a hormone produced during pregnancy) levels every 48 hours. I was soon called to be told that my hCG level wasn’t rising as it should have, and I was brought in for ultrasounds, where I saw my empty womb. No signs of a baby in there, just an unidentified mass near my ovary, in the Fallopian tube. A further blood test confirmed that my hCG levels had stopped rising.
On the 13th of July 2017, I was admitted to hospital and given a shot of methotrexate (medical management), given the standard recommendation of rest to reduce the risk of rupture and regular blood tests until I was no longer testing positive on a pregnancy test. A long month of blood and cramps and tears followed.
Nobody understood the pain. The fact that it was my second loss within just four months. I was called selfish for not visiting a relative’s newborn while I was on bedrest, losing my baby. The stigma around it stung way more than that methotrexate injection.”
– Healthcare professionals need to learn to not diagnose based on the patient’s pain level.
– And families need to be educated on how painful pregnancy loss can be.
I hope this story will help people who find themselves in a similar situation and help them feel less lonely. I have had two successful pregnancies since then and my heart is full, but hugs with my girl’s often make me think of what exactly it is that I lost on that day.