For a few years I struggled to conceive, and when I finally did in 2016, something didn’t seem right, and I just couldn’t get excited about it. I was experiencing discomfort and bleeding which I didn’t feel was normal. To say it was my first pregnancy you would think I would have been excited after trying for so long… something didn’t feel right though, I could sense something was wrong.
The pain in the abdominal area and bleeding increased, so I went to the emergency department to get checked out. I had a gut feeling that it wasn’t going to be a good outcome. The doctor at the time seemed to think that I wasn’t pregnant and although he asked me to do a pregnancy test which was faint, he decided I was ok to go home, and that it was a phantom pregnancy. At the time I didn’t know what to think, but I was unhappy with this diagnosis.
The next morning… I rang my own GP (general practitioner) at my surgery and was asked to attend for an emergency appointment. He was very angry at the care I had received previously and referred me to the hospital’s early pregnancy assessment unit. I was seen the same day, had bloodwork taken, and a scan. I couldn’t really think about what was happening and all I wanted was to not feel the pain and have hope that I was going to be ok. They were brilliant and monitored me all that week.
Within a few days I had a phone call asking me to pack an overnight bag and attend the emergency department where I would be greeted and taken to the surgical ward. Luckily, I knew some of the staff and this helped me a lot and kept me calm (I had worked in the NHS previously). I was admitted that night with a scan booked for the following morning. That night I was in so much pain but well looked after.
I had the scan the next morning and I was told the pregnancy couldn’t be seen. A nurse, consultant and some others, from what I remember, explained that my pregnancy had ruptured my Fallopian tube. I would have to go for emergency surgery. I couldn’t believe what was happening and it was frightening, I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I feared not waking up from the surgery and as I was anxious about my body being in danger I was upset that I had failed to carry a baby. I was struggling with what was happening and how quickly I was having to deal with it all. I had great family and friends supporting me at the time.
When I woke up from the emergency surgery, I was told that my right Fallopian tube had been fully removed and I was lucky to be alive basically. All I could think about was how I had failed to be pregnant after years of trying, and how the doctor in the emergency department had failed to notice a week prior that something wasn’t right. He sent me home and if I hadn’t have gone with my gut feeling and rang my own surgery the outcome may have been even worse than it already was.
I can honestly say it was one of the worst experiences of my life and my mental health took a bit of a turn after it. I was in so much pain recovering from keyhole surgery whilst dealing with losing a pregnancy… also dealing with my own thoughts of having one Fallopian tube and possibly struggling to have any more children.
After a few months I felt differently, and that I had been given another chance of life and that I could have died from this. I was not going to let it defeat me, I was determined to be a mummy!
Four months after my surgery I became pregnant, but it was such an anxious time. I couldn’t relax and I felt like my body was still so fragile. I had to do anything I could to make sure I didn’t go through the same thing again. I rang the early pregnancy unit as soon as I found out I was pregnant. I was checked constantly, scanned, and I was so lucky, the pregnancy was in the right place! It felt like a miracle, I believe that this was a miracle. My due date was the same date as my previous ectopic pregnancy surgery; when I was saved. I had a baby due on the same day as my loss the year before! I honestly believe it was a miracle, and I went on to have a beautiful healthy baby boy who is now six years old. The whole pregnancy was an anxious time, but I was monitored and had the best care.
I hope that my story can bring some hope to anyone struggling after a Fallopian tube removal. It was such a horrible traumatic experience, and I was heartbroken, but I am lucky to be alive and the early pregnancy assessment unit saved my life. It is sad and frustrating for me though as I don’t feel some of the emergency departments have the experience dealing with early-stage pregnancy and the dangers. I feel there is not enough awareness, which is why I try my best to share my experience and help anyone that I can.
I am positive and always feel that if I hadn’t of been through what I had, I wouldn’t have my little boy now. He wouldn’t be here. If anything, I see it as a miracle and wouldn’t change anything other than the education about early pregnancy and the risks and dangers which I think some doctors would benefit from. I want ectopic pregnancy to be recognised and not be just a figure, but recognised as being just as important as any other pregnancy that ends too early. Thank you for reading my story.
I’m a lucky mum of a son who is a miracle, and I feel honoured to be able to share my story with others.
Thank you to Kerry for sharing her experience. If you would like to share your experience of ectopic pregnancy, please visit our guide for more information.
Please remember our support services are available at any time.