Initial diagnosis of Pregnancy of Unknown Location

It started with an accident. A plan B. Three weeks later, a pregnancy test – positive. 

I’m in my mid-twenties and wasn’t sure I was ready to have a baby. I wasn’t sure how to feel. It all moved incredibly quickly. 

 I was sent for an ultrasound – no pregnancy found in the uterus. I was diagnosed with a Pregnancy of Unknown Location and scheduled for a more detailed scan the next day. At that point, I was still being told that an ectopic pregnancy was unlikely. 

That night, I had agonising pain in my left side. I wish I had listened to my body and gone for help, but I went to sleep instead. It’s strange what we do when we’re in survival mode. If you’re in pain, go to A&E (Accident and Emergency Department) or call for help – don’t risk it. I was lucky it didn’t rupture – but the damage was already done. 

The next day I arrived for my transvaginal ultrasound. I hated those ultrasounds. They were perhaps one of the most traumatic parts of the experience. Still – nothing. They almost sent me home. 

 I was lucky enough to be seen by a doctor. I told her I was in pain, and she told me she was worried. She took me seriously and called a consultant. My third ultrasound finally found it – an ectopic pregnancy on my left Fallopian tube. 

 Then everything blurred. A surgeon arrived – they said surgery was the best option. 

 I just cried. Doctors and nurses whizzed around me, placing cannula and giving me information I can’t remember. I was rushed to surgery. Someone held my hand as I sobbed and went under. 

 

I am incredibly grateful to the NHS (National Health Service) professionals for keeping me safe. 

The strangest thing was I could feel where the pregnancy had been. I could feel an emptiness on my left side. It was odd and uncomfortable. It felt… sad. 

It was awful being stuck in bed. I was desperate to get back to normal life. The pain for the first few days was intense – especially the shoulder pain from the gas used during surgery. I rested a lot, but I also made sure to move gently. I focused on small recovery goals: fewer pain meds, no infections, back to work part-time. 

Emotionally, I was very tearful. My partner was a fantastic support. Physical healing has a predictable timeline. Emotional healing does not. 

 My recovery went smoothly. I was back to work in two weeks. 

One of the hardest parts was the first period afterward – it was extremely heavy. I found that quite triggering, as it felt like a visceral reminder of the loss. The second cycle was more normal, and I found that reassuring – it felt like a return to whatever “normal” now meant.  

It affected me emotionally, but I think I’ve coped better than I expected – because I allowed myself to grieve. I named my pregnancy. My vicar held a memorial service. I ordered a baby loss certificate. I attended support groups from the Ectopic Pregnancy Trust. I leaned on my therapy group. 

I’ve moved on as best I can. I’m not torn apart, but I am changed. Writing this, I realise it still haunts me a few months on. It doesn’t occupy every moment, but it returns often. I’ve learned to let it come and go like waves.  

I think it’s important to find ways to memorialise and honour the loss. 

I remind myself that losing a Fallopian tube only reduces fertility by 10% to 30%. As angry as I was with my body, I also think it’s an amazing thing. The scars will fade – but I don’t mind them. They’re part of this journey. Evidence that I survived. 

On my due date, I’m going to plant a tulip garden. 

It’s important to create something meaningful. 

I was here. I survived. 

O 

 

 

Thank you to our contributor for sharing her experience. If you would like to share your experience of ectopic pregnancy, please visit our guide for more information.                  

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